hetalia_kink | Hetalia Kink meme part 15

Jessica spends the night at the hospital. He can’t sleep, because nurses keep coming into the room to make sure he’s not dead and the machinery that they just will not move is whirring and humming way too loudly. So instead of sleeping, he thinks. Mostly he thinks about Kirkland and this ‘League of Nations’. Kirkland had talked about it as though he knew it intimately. Maybe he was one of the former members. Maybe he wasn’t former. Maybe he was current and recruiting.

Jessica doesn’t understand why he was invited. But the more he thinks about it, the more he wants to be part of it. He flips on the light to look at the list at least five times, and every time he gets caught on the very first country: Austria.

Jessica knows very little about Austria. What little he does know comes from last semester’s American History project: a reenactment of the Treaty of Versailles. He and a classmate had been paired up as the Austro-Hungary Empire, and though it had ended badly, the classmate trying to make a move on him and reacting harshly to the word ‘no’, what Jessica remembers vividly is the absolute thrill of being a different person, of being a representative of a great Empire, a mighty power.

Austria isn’t a great power anymore, but it is a place that Jessica knows, which is more than he can say for half the countries on his list.

He wakes up to his parents anxious faces. Which is a terrible way to start any day, but Jessica finds that he just can’t feel angry. A little irritated maybe, when they immediately launch into tearful apologies and promises of change that he’s heard after every single crisis, but he knows that they try, which he thinks is something.

So he’s only a little bit pissed off when he announces his intention to try this ‘group therapy’. When they hug him and promise to support him through anything, he smiles a little. They do try, at least.

But there is work to be done, so Jessica acquires his dad’s cellphone and calls up Kirkland first thing. Kirkland’s drawl is even more pronounced early in the morning, making him sound like North Carolina and a teacher that Jessica used to love, which is the wrong thing to think of, so instead he thinks of that creepy calm.

“Kirkland – Doctor.” Jessica does have to defer to his parents sense of decorum while they’re watching him, so he keeps his voice down and respectful. “It’s Edelstein. Jessica? I’ll… I want to go. To your League, I mean.”

Kirkland’s voice is very calm when he answers. “Have you thought at all about what Nation you would like?”

“Yeah! I mean,” here Jessica fumbles, tries to squash down this traitorous, childish excitement. “I wanna be Austria. That sounds like a good country, right?”

“Yes.” Kirkland is still placidly calm, and if he’s amused, he’s not letting on. “Austria is a fine country. A country steeped in music and in history. Now then,” he says, “I have your parents’ e-mails, and I will send the location of the next meeting to them, along with the plane ticket. All you will need to do is bring three days worth of clothing and toiletries, fifty dollars as the co-pay, and a bit of spending money, if you’d like. The rest is taken care of.”

“Wow.” Despite himself, Jessica is impressed. “Wow, um, thank you. Thanks a lot.”

“It’s no problem. One more thing, Mr. Edelstein.”

“What?”

This time, Jessica can hear Kirkland’s amusement. “Perhaps you would like a new name. Germanic, of course. Roderich maybe?”

Kirkland hangs up on him, but Jessica can’t be angry. Instead, he grins at the phone, stupidly happy that Kirkland called him Mr. Edelstein. He closes his eyes and grins ‘till his face hurts and thinks, Roderich. I could get used to that.

-tbc-

to my only commenter: you got half of it! not hungary, but austria. i hope that's not dissapointing.

(Same commenter) Don't worry. I'm not disappointed XD I was just trying to figure out who it was. Maybe I should have noticed the last name?

I still like the story! There's not so much to comment on yet, so I'll just stick with my failure at what to call these guys... Jessica? Roderich? Austria? OTL Anyway, I'm sure the meeting will be as hilariously chaotic as usual XD

My LJ is being weird, so it sometimes doesn't load all the pages of a fill and I don't realize that there's more story than what I've read.

He'll call himself either Austria or Roderich from now on, unless he's talking about the past.

And I'm slowly building to the meeting! I keep wanting to go down detours and get introspective.

also, since you're the only commenter, how do you feel about austria/england? nothing too overt, besides blatant fangirling on roderichs part, but since it's just you, you get to decide! it could go either way at this point.

It’s not as easy as that, of course. Two days later he’s back in school and he has to deal with teenagers. They whisper just out of his hearing, his stint in the hospital apparently not quelling their maliciousness. For once, though, he doesn’t care, simply because he’s got something to focus on that isn’t them.

He cuts American History to hide out in the library with his laptop, five tabs worth of Austrian history and culture open and a Wikipedia article on their music grabbing his attention. He opens it, a little disappointed when it turns out to just be a list of composers. He doesn’t have much patience for classical. Still, he dutifully copies their names into Youtube, pulls on his headphones, and listens.

It’s beautiful. It’s elegant and flowing, and he listens to the music dance with something approaching grace, not at all like what he’s always liked and he loves it. He thinks that maybe this, this beauty and grace and culture is what Austria is. He thinks that it’s what he wants to be, more than anything else he has ever wanted: he wants to be as lovely as this music.

-tbc-

STILL BUILDING UP. Scene 07 is shaping as the landing and the hotel. So Scene 08 should finally have the meeting, and from their it'll be a lot more character interaction. Roderich is going to love having so many beautiful affectionate allies/past allies.

There are two and a half weeks before his first meeting, and he spends all of that time obsessively getting ready. He spends time at thrift shops and vintage stores, trawls the internet for clothing and comes up with an outfit that wouldn’t be out of place at the turn of the century. This he packs into his suitcase along with normal clothes, too ashamed to try and wear it on the plane.

He tries to mimic an Austrian accent, the Germanic tilt lending his words weight and meaning. After only two weeks, his voice is barely passable, but he has a five hour plane ride down to Pennsylvania to practice.

He purchases an old tea set at a thrift shop. It’s been well loved, the simple blue and white pattern fading with time, but it’s gorgeous and he loves it. He spends time locked in his room with books on manners and etiquette, practicing curling his fingers around the tea cup just so, making the movement as fluid as possible.

All this practice is exhausting, but also enlightening. He’s forced to slow down, to be careful. He has to think as he forms his words. He needs to calculate every step he takes. He’s forced to watch his fingers curl around the teacup so delicately, feeling the bruises under his binding, and marvel at how much more effort it takes to be gentle.

He really does need the practice, but although he swears to himself that he’ll practice on the plane, he ends up falling asleep. It’s the first natural sleep he’s had in weeks.

-tbc-

Alright. Scene 07 is awaiting confirmation on how whether or not I should write with romance in mind. I update so damn fast it almost doesn't matter, though

HI! (Same reviewer...other people need to review too!) Haha, I just noticed the update OTL.

Woooo! Go Austria! Listening to Schubert (I just sang his Mass in A Flat for my chorus concert last week) is totally cool! Mozart is cool too!

About the romance, I don't care either way. I ship world/world, so whatever makes the most sense I say go for it!

Okay! Scene 07 and maybe Scene 08 should be up by tomorrow! And I asked because it seems like a lot of people like Austria het or with Prussia the most, to the point where a lot of the people I know don't like him with anyone else. So I thought I'd ask.

He jolts awake.

He’s disoriented and maybe panicking a little, because this isn’t his bed, this isn’t any place he recognizes, where is he. Then he realizes he’s on the plane and he feels really stupid and sort of paranoid. He doesn’t meet the concerned gaze of the woman next to him, steadfastly ignoring her until she gets up to grab her carry-on.

He shivers impatiently. Roderich has never liked planes very much. He doesn’t think anyone does.

Finally the line begins to move, and Roderich snatches up his carry-on from underneath his seat, follows the woman in a sluggish claustrophobic line off the plane, where he parts from her.

He gets lost trying to find the baggage claim, wandering to increasingly ridiculous places until he’s in a tiny inter-faith chapel. There’s a small sign near the door, onto which someone has helpfully inked in the direction to Mecca.

Roderich wants to scream.

Eventually though, he does find the baggage claim, where only his poor sad suitcase is left circling the belt. He grabs it and runs towards the exit. He’s absolutely sure he doesn’t know where he’s going from here, or how he’s going to get there, but he hopes that if he gets out of the building he’ll find something.

He’s distracted by a flash of white in his peripherals. Turning to look at it, he sees Kirkland, calm as ever, holding up a whiteboard with RODERICH stenciled on it.

Roderich jogs over, apologies falling from his mouth before he can even think about what he’s saying. He tries to explain that he got lost and didn’t know what was happening and couldn’t find anyone to ask for help but he stops when he realizes that Kirkland just looks amused, the bastard.

Amusement is a good look on Kirkland, in Roderichs opinion. He looks less like an automaton that way, more human. Barely human, still something above and beyond normal people, but it’s a step up.

Kirkland pseudo-smiles like he can tell what Roderich is thinking.

“Come.” He touches Roderich lightly on the shoulder, “We’ll take a taxi to the hotel.”

Roderich fakes a smile too, and smacks Kirkland on the back.

“Whatever you say, Doctor.”

-tbc-

so when i say two scenes tomorrow, i actually mean one scene a week later. in my defense, i was taken to yet another psychiatrist who thinks it's funny to completely deny that i'm trans just because i'm not interested in the vagina to not-actually-a-penis surgery.

the scene titles are also getting increasingly stupid.

New reader here, and I just want to say LOVE. For this entire thing. <333333 Does he know how to play the piano? Is he going to learn? Please tell me he's going to learn.

Also, my sympathies on the stupid psychiatrist. From the sound of it, I'm guessing that you don't have much control over the entire therapy process, so I won't tell you to find a psychologist with experience in GLBTQ issues (thought that would be ideal). Have you explained how mediocre all the surgery options are? "At least what I have right now actually functions" is an explanation that might work. Another option is, "I want to pass, and the presence of breasts is a lot easier to notice than the lack of a dick, so right now I'm too busy freaking out about my chest to worry about what's in my pants." Those explanations don't work on everyone, but they do work on some people. Good luck~

FLIP. I FEEL LIKE THE WORST WRITERNON EVER.

I deeply apologize for not updating for like 6 months. Strange as it sounds, now that school is starting up again my schedule will be less terrible, and I'll have more time to work on this. I WILL ATTEMPT TO UPDATE WITHIN THE WEEK, IF YOU STILL CHECK THIS EVER. I'M SORRY.

The taxi ride passes nearly silently. Roderich leans against the window and pretends he’s interested in the green hills and picturesque houses that flash by, but truthfully, he’s only paying attention to Kirkland in the seat next to him, looking as bored as ever. Thankfully, the ride is a short one, and they’re deposited in front of a mid-sized hotel before he has to think up conversation.

Kirkland kindly helps him out of the taxi, and lets Roderich lean heavily against him when he trips over his own feet like a derp. Roderich clutches tightly to his suitcase as Kirkland leads him through the hotel, past a small convention hall attached to the lobby, up an elevator, and into a small room with two single beds. He gestures for Roderich to set his suitcase down on one, and explains that everyone has to double up, and since Kirkland is normally alone (possibly because of issues, Roderich’s mind helpfully provides) he and Roderich will be sharing.

When Roderich thinks of the sheer amount of people that he’s going to meet, the huge crowd he’ll get lost in and the anxiety of passing, he thinks that he’s okay with sharing with someone he knows, and even more okay with getting paired up with Kirkland.

Hetalia Kink meme part 15

A Land Full of Music - Scene 03 - Making a Decision

A Land Full of Music - Scene 04 - Roderich

Re: A Land Full of Music - Scene 04 - Roderich

Re: A Land Full of Music - Scene 04 - Roderich

A Land Full of Music - Scene 05 - Schubert and Mozart

A Land Full of Music - Scene 06 - A Crash Course in Country

Re: A Land Full of Music - Scene 06 - A Crash Course in Country

Re: A Land Full of Music - Scene 06 - A Crash Course in Country

A Land Full of Music - Scene 07 - Oh Hai Arthur

Re: A Land Full of Music - Scene 07 - Oh Hai Arthur

Re: A Land Full of Music - Scene 07 - Oh Hai Arthur

A Land Full of Music - Scene 08 - I sense tension...