once again, taking so long. to clarify things, one ecstasy pill is enough already. Feliciano is able to ingest more than one during the course of 24 hours due to his Nation resistance? :P he's not entirely human, after all.
-----
Why was everything turning so gloom now? Before the colours were so bright and everything felt wonderful under his fingers, and cuddling with Lovino had also been awesome, and it all had looked warm, and coming to him…
Now… now…
“I want my candies!” he yelled, feeling his throat burn in pain.
His body craved for something, and he knew it was connected somehow to his delicious candies, and remain without them would mean go back to how depressed he had felt the first day, when he had only bought one.
He had felt depressed for the first time in centuries –he had even started thinking of Holy Roman Empire after years since he disappeared, and that had made him cry hard, sobbing and tearing down his beloved paintings from the wall, since everything of Venice reminded him of the young blond.
Not even his brother coming home had helped, his anger spiking up… so he had bought more candies. They had kept him cheery.
Not many, at first. Just three more –they were awfully expensive, after all– but they had all been consumed in a day, much to the shock of the guy who had sold them to him (he had looked surprised, but mostly uncaring, selling him more without asking questions).
He slammed his closed fists on the wall, yelping at the pain, and kept on punching the wall. There was some sort of comfort in doing it over and over, so he kept slamming his fists hard until strong arms grabbed him and held him still, one hand circling his wrists.
“Let me go! Let me go!” he whined, nailing at the arms.
More tears were running down his cheeks, and it was painful, and it hurt, and he didn’t want to be sad!
“Stop! It’s ok!” Ludwig didn’t really know what to do other than hold Feliciano close, whispering calming words in his ears, so he simply did that, sliding on the ground and turning the Italian around so he could look at him. “Feliciano, look at me… you don’t need the candies, just breathe… it’ll be over soon, I promise, it’ll be over soon”.
Feliciano buried his face in Ludwig’s chest, sobbing pitifully. No, it wasn’t ok.
He felt shitty, his throat hurt, his feet hurt, his hands hurt, and his whole body as well, felt tired and heavy.
More so, now that he had thought about him again, the memories of his first love weren’t leaving his mind anymore.
“Sacro Romano Impero…” he mumbled, now feeling twice as bad as before for the words he had yelled at Ludwig.
The older Nation had been always nice with him, just like Holy Roman, patient and tolerant and sweet, and he’d just yelled at him something so untrue!
“What did you say?” Ludwig, who wasn’t familiar with the Italian words Feliciano had just mumbled, was left puzzling over them as the brown haired Nation clung at his chest again, crying. “Italia…”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it! I don’t hate Germany, I really don’t! I love Germany just as much as I’ve loved Sacro Romano Impero!”
Looking up and meeting the worried expression of Ludwig, Feliciano cried more, unable to understand his own reactions.
“Don’t hate me, please, don’t hate me!” he sobbed. “Don’t leave me like he did!”
The words hit Ludwig like blades.
Leave him? Like who did?
Nonetheless, his grip on the Italian’s lithe body only tightened.
“I won’t leave you. I’ll be right there with you” he whispered, grateful when the shivering and sobbing started to subside. “Italia, you’ve been high on drugs. They were not candies. They made you hyper and excited and now they’re making you feel this way… it might hurt you but it will be better not to eat those anymore”.
Brown, teary eyes looked up at him uncertainly. “D–drugs…?” the trembling hands clenched more of Ludwig’s jacket, until the knuckles were white. “N–not candies…?”
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Painful Addiction [5/6]
(Anonymous) 2009-05-01 01:53 pm (UTC)(link)-----
Why was everything turning so gloom now? Before the colours were so bright and everything felt wonderful under his fingers, and cuddling with Lovino had also been awesome, and it all had looked warm, and coming to him…
Now… now…
“I want my candies!” he yelled, feeling his throat burn in pain.
His body craved for something, and he knew it was connected somehow to his delicious candies, and remain without them would mean go back to how depressed he had felt the first day, when he had only bought one.
He had felt depressed for the first time in centuries –he had even started thinking of Holy Roman Empire after years since he disappeared, and that had made him cry hard, sobbing and tearing down his beloved paintings from the wall, since everything of Venice reminded him of the young blond.
Not even his brother coming home had helped, his anger spiking up… so he had bought more candies. They had kept him cheery.
Not many, at first. Just three more –they were awfully expensive, after all– but they had all been consumed in a day, much to the shock of the guy who had sold them to him (he had looked surprised, but mostly uncaring, selling him more without asking questions).
He slammed his closed fists on the wall, yelping at the pain, and kept on punching the wall. There was some sort of comfort in doing it over and over, so he kept slamming his fists hard until strong arms grabbed him and held him still, one hand circling his wrists.
“Let me go! Let me go!” he whined, nailing at the arms.
More tears were running down his cheeks, and it was painful, and it hurt, and he didn’t want to be sad!
“Stop! It’s ok!” Ludwig didn’t really know what to do other than hold Feliciano close, whispering calming words in his ears, so he simply did that, sliding on the ground and turning the Italian around so he could look at him. “Feliciano, look at me… you don’t need the candies, just breathe… it’ll be over soon, I promise, it’ll be over soon”.
Feliciano buried his face in Ludwig’s chest, sobbing pitifully. No, it wasn’t ok.
He felt shitty, his throat hurt, his feet hurt, his hands hurt, and his whole body as well, felt tired and heavy.
More so, now that he had thought about him again, the memories of his first love weren’t leaving his mind anymore.
“Sacro Romano Impero…” he mumbled, now feeling twice as bad as before for the words he had yelled at Ludwig.
The older Nation had been always nice with him, just like Holy Roman, patient and tolerant and sweet, and he’d just yelled at him something so untrue!
“What did you say?” Ludwig, who wasn’t familiar with the Italian words Feliciano had just mumbled, was left puzzling over them as the brown haired Nation clung at his chest again, crying. “Italia…”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it! I don’t hate Germany, I really don’t! I love Germany just as much as I’ve loved Sacro Romano Impero!”
Looking up and meeting the worried expression of Ludwig, Feliciano cried more, unable to understand his own reactions.
“Don’t hate me, please, don’t hate me!” he sobbed. “Don’t leave me like he did!”
The words hit Ludwig like blades.
Leave him? Like who did?
Nonetheless, his grip on the Italian’s lithe body only tightened.
“I won’t leave you. I’ll be right there with you” he whispered, grateful when the shivering and sobbing started to subside. “Italia, you’ve been high on drugs. They were not candies. They made you hyper and excited and now they’re making you feel this way… it might hurt you but it will be better not to eat those anymore”.
Brown, teary eyes looked up at him uncertainly. “D–drugs…?” the trembling hands clenched more of Ludwig’s jacket, until the knuckles were white. “N–not candies…?”