Not so anon since I x-posted on main comm but who cares... I thought this would be a good way of working out my complicated feelings for Yao. Will also welcome feedback from other Chinese and hear about your personal relationship with Yao/HK or Taiwan whether you are still living in their houses or abroad like me. Would love to read your author/country fanfic in fact. It was actually inspired by this lovely fanart (scroll down for the bamboo pic).
This is kinda personal so please be gentle….I’m baring my heart here…
The first thing that seeped through her consciousness was the sound of a clear, warm tenor voice singing a familiar childhood lullaby. (Note 1)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDWG2s1ITds
She opened her eyes into a world of dappled green and yellow shadows. She was lying on soft grass in a dense bamboo grove full of giant bamboo trees reaching into the sky. The sky was a soft blue and there were little fluffy clouds whisked past by the brisk breeze. An unseen brook gurgled in the distance. The air was filled with the fragrance of jasmine.
The singer was a slender man with long ebony hair draped elegantly over his shoulder in red hanfu sitting next to her. His delicate porcelain features and unexpectedly chubby face made him appear no older than 25 yet it was impossible to gauge his true age. He looked exhausted and sad but smiled at her and offered her his hand.
The fine-boned hand was not much larger than hers and slightly callused with tapering fingers. She grasped it and sat up.
“I know who you are. I’m dreaming, aren’t I? There is no way I could be here in reality.”
“Why didn’t you come back to visit me? All of your family came back home so often over the years to visit my children here. I was hoping to see you all grown up into a lovely woman, daughter.”
“I was too afraid to come back. I hated and despised you all those years…if you hadn’t been poor, troubled and beset with enemies, we wouldn’t have had to escape. I would have been born right here. My family wouldn’t have had to board creaky boats and sail away over the alien seas. Your sons and daughters wouldn’t have had to toil and suffer in other people’s lands.”
Hot tears were welling through her eyes and she hung her head in shame. The man took her into his arms in a rustle of soft silk. Laying her head on the frail chest, she continued.
“What did we have left of you? A jade bangle, a handful of old folk songs and memories of endless sorrow and humiliation. Your exiles told their restless, fidgety children that you had a glorious civilization that has existed for over 4000 years but then things fell apart. I hated copying out the characters of your language as a child.”
“好了，不要在哭。” (It’s ok, please don’t cry.)He wiped away her tears gently with his long sleeve.
“My grandfather wanted to come back all of his life, I’m glad he finally did. When strangers see my eyes and thick jet-black hair, they think of you, a faraway, mysterious land I never laid foot on, perhaps a land with cloud-enshrouded mountains on which the fairies of Penglai still dwell. I’m homesick but I never even knew you.”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t take better care of all of you. I was weak and sick. I’m trying to do my best now for the many children who still live here. I know we still have a lot of problems. I need to find a way to take care of everyone.”
“I thought I hated you but I got angry when I saw Francis with your bronze heads. I got angry when I thought of Kiku stabbing you in the back and all those foreign countries trying to take advantage of you. But I don’t belong to you anymore. We have our own country now. I can’t come back home again. It will never be the same.” Tears ran down her face and she tasted her own shimmering salt.
“I wish you and your people prosperity, peace and happiness. Even if I never come back, I like to think that you and your other children are always there, laughing and going about their lives. Maybe I will return one day and gather fresh bamboo shoots in your groves. And we’ll talk over delicate cups of smoky tea and eat them together with silver chopsticks. Yao, you have lived for so long, what’s another hundred years? Your bosses will change but you will survive and thrive in this world for our sake, won’t you?”
Wang Yao didn’t say a word but stroked the girl’s long hair fondly.
As her consciousness began to fade, she murmured “再见了，我亲爱的祖国...”(Goodbye, my beloved ancestral land.)
The End
Note 1: This is a sappy well-known Chinese children’s song called “Mother is the Best Thing in the World” about the love of a mother, how fortunate a child with a mother is and how sad it would be to be an orphan. Since Yao is portrayed as kinda feminine/big brotherly…
P.S. Sorry, this ended up so sappy, I wept while watching too many East Asia MADs with motherly Yao I guess. Becoming a Hetalia fan has made me a lot more empathetic towards Yao as I learn more about his sad history. Silly but true. I hope I will get up the courage to visit one day. I’m the only one in the family who hasn’t been there.
Anon, I'll be honest with you and say that this is the only fic here that brought tears to my eye....This line specially "I’m homesick but I never even knew you.” Although from another country, I know exatcly how that feels....
My own country is very different physically (climate, plants/animals) and culturally from China so I can't help but wonder what it would be like to experience things unique to my native land back "home".
We still practice Chinese customs but it feels sort of out of context if you know what I mean because we live elsewhere and the whole country doesn't shut down for Chinese festivals. So I'm sort of stuck with the nostalgia...
It's just part of the package of coming from immigrant stock I guess
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In Dappled Dreams of Bamboo (China) Part 1/2
(Anonymous) 2009-03-21 02:27 pm (UTC)(link)I thought this would be a good way of working out my complicated feelings for Yao. Will also welcome feedback from other Chinese and hear about your personal relationship with Yao/HK or Taiwan whether you are still living in their houses or abroad like me. Would love to read your author/country fanfic in fact. It was actually inspired by this lovely fanart (scroll down for the bamboo pic).
http://community.livejournal.com/hetalia/1098703.html
Also inspired by this:
online.wsj.com/article/SB123689227002811567.html
This is kinda personal so please be gentle….I’m baring my heart here…
The first thing that seeped through her consciousness was the sound of a clear, warm tenor voice singing a familiar childhood lullaby. (Note 1)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDWG2s1ITds
She opened her eyes into a world of dappled green and yellow shadows. She was lying on soft grass in a dense bamboo grove full of giant bamboo trees reaching into the sky. The sky was a soft blue and there were little fluffy clouds whisked past by the brisk breeze. An unseen brook gurgled in the distance. The air was filled with the fragrance of jasmine.
The singer was a slender man with long ebony hair draped elegantly over his shoulder in red hanfu sitting next to her. His delicate porcelain features and unexpectedly chubby face made him appear no older than 25 yet it was impossible to gauge his true age. He looked exhausted and sad but smiled at her and offered her his hand.
The fine-boned hand was not much larger than hers and slightly callused with tapering fingers. She grasped it and sat up.
“I know who you are. I’m dreaming, aren’t I? There is no way I could be here in reality.”
“Why didn’t you come back to visit me? All of your family came back home so often over the years to visit my children here. I was hoping to see you all grown up into a lovely woman, daughter.”
“I was too afraid to come back. I hated and despised you all those years…if you hadn’t been poor, troubled and beset with enemies, we wouldn’t have had to escape. I would have been born right here. My family wouldn’t have had to board creaky boats and sail away over the alien seas. Your sons and daughters wouldn’t have had to toil and suffer in other people’s lands.”
Hot tears were welling through her eyes and she hung her head in shame. The man took her into his arms in a rustle of soft silk. Laying her head on the frail chest, she continued.
In Dappled Dreams of Bamboo (China) Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2009-03-21 02:29 pm (UTC)(link)“好了，不要在哭。” (It’s ok, please don’t cry.)He wiped away her tears gently with his long sleeve.
“My grandfather wanted to come back all of his life, I’m glad he finally did. When strangers see my eyes and thick jet-black hair, they think of you, a faraway, mysterious land I never laid foot on, perhaps a land with cloud-enshrouded mountains on which the fairies of Penglai still dwell. I’m homesick but I never even knew you.”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t take better care of all of you. I was weak and sick. I’m trying to do my best now for the many children who still live here. I know we still have a lot of problems. I need to find a way to take care of everyone.”
“I thought I hated you but I got angry when I saw Francis with your bronze heads. I got angry when I thought of Kiku stabbing you in the back and all those foreign countries trying to take advantage of you. But I don’t belong to you anymore. We have our own country now. I can’t come back home again. It will never be the same.” Tears ran down her face and she tasted her own shimmering salt.
“I wish you and your people prosperity, peace and happiness. Even if I never come back, I like to think that you and your other children are always there, laughing and going about their lives. Maybe I will return one day and gather fresh bamboo shoots in your groves. And we’ll talk over delicate cups of smoky tea and eat them together with silver chopsticks. Yao, you have lived for so long, what’s another hundred years? Your bosses will change but you will survive and thrive in this world for our sake, won’t you?”
Wang Yao didn’t say a word but stroked the girl’s long hair fondly.
As her consciousness began to fade, she murmured “再见了，我亲爱的祖国...”(Goodbye, my beloved ancestral land.)
The End
Note 1: This is a sappy well-known Chinese children’s song called “Mother is the Best Thing in the World” about the love of a mother, how fortunate a child with a mother is and how sad it would be to be an orphan. Since Yao is portrayed as kinda feminine/big brotherly…
P.S. Sorry, this ended up so sappy, I wept while watching too many East Asia MADs with motherly Yao I guess. Becoming a Hetalia fan has made me a lot more empathetic towards Yao as I learn more about his sad history. Silly but true. I hope I will get up the courage to visit one day. I’m the only one in the family who hasn’t been there.
Re: In Dappled Dreams of Bamboo (China) Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2009-03-23 05:09 am (UTC)(link)Re: In Dappled Dreams of Bamboo (China) Part 2/2
(Anonymous) 2009-03-24 12:42 pm (UTC)(link)My own country is very different physically (climate, plants/animals) and culturally from China so I can't help but wonder what it would be like to experience things unique to my native land back "home".
We still practice Chinese customs but it feels sort of out of context if you know what I mean because we live elsewhere and the whole country doesn't shut down for Chinese festivals. So I'm sort of stuck with the nostalgia...
It's just part of the package of coming from immigrant stock I guess