I like this so far, Authornon! I think it'll turn into something really great~

However, I do have a tiny detail I want to point out. You have a tendency to switch between present and past tense without warning; as much as that's a valid technique for a story, it doesn't quite work if you do it in the same paragraph. ^^ Just keep an eye out for that~

I am definitely watching this story though. \o/