Romanian anon from earlier - I simply couldn't pass this up since I think this is the first time someone ever requests Romania in this meme. See notes at the end for brief clarifications.
Romania gave him a long, calculating stare, and America wondered briefly whether she'd understood him. Her English was a little odd, her accent clipped and the tendency to roll her R's made him slightly uncomfortable for some reason, but otherwise she spoke fairly well.
'I read it in a book,' he supplied, just to be sure. 'I thought it was cool.'
'America,' Romania said, very patiently. 'Vampires do not sparkle.'
The finality in her tone made him frown. America was not generally big on vampire lore, but he tended to believe that authors did some solid, believable research before they wrote anything. Otherwise, who in their right minds would publish them?
'Well, how do you know?'
Romania gave a short laugh. 'According to Mr. Stoker, I am supposed to be somewhat of an authority on the subject.' She pointed in the general direction of the Bran castle, which, America had to admit, looked properly ominous, even in broad daylight.
'You book is wrong.' she concluded. 'And so, I'm afraid, is Mr. Stoker's, although sometimes I do wonder whether we should build him a statue in front of our Trade Ministry building. Or name a street after him.'
America frowned. Surely Mr. Stoker at least had done some solid, believable research before writing his book? He was famous. He'd been famous longer than... what was her name again?
'Vlad did not sparkle.' Romania went on, her tone picking up an odd, vaguely grim note.'Twitch slightly, yes. Giggle to himself, of course. Run fifty people through with sharp sticks and then have lunch while listening to their agonized screams - well, that is historically documented. But he did not sparkle.'
'Cool,' America said a little absently, poking at a plastic mask hung from one of the stalls around them. It began to laugh darkly, and slightly mechanically, its eyes flashing red and eliciting the appearance of a jovial old man from behind the stall.
'For you, just fifteen dollars,' he said happily. Romania rolled her eyes.
'But hey,' America said a few moments later, the mask dangling from its elastic band around his neck, 'There has to be some truth in it, right? Otherwise you wouldn't be selling all these vampire t-shirts, and vampire mugs and vampire woodcuts and tiny fake silver knives and stuff. Um. Right? Why do you sell them anyway?'
'Because your people buy so much of it.' Romania caught his expression, and then began to laugh, honestly and not entirely unkindly.
'Come on,' she said, patting his arm 'I will treat you to some palinka.'
1. Romanians these days kind of make fun of foreigners who go 'ZOMG VAMPIRES!!1!' when visiting Bran Castle. I've been there four or five times and it tends to happen a lot. I think Romania would be very endearing to America about it.
2. Run fifty people through with sharp sticks and then have lunch while listening to their agonized screams - well, that is historically documented - it is. So is the fact that Vlad III 'The Impaler' has had some 80,000 people put to death during his rule, through such exciting methods as impalement, flaying, or driving iron nails through their skulls. Interestingly, the impalement part was a practice he picked up from the Turks, where it was fairly common, but it was Vlad who ended up being famous for it.
3. Aaah, Bran Castle. The famed Dracula's Castle has a permanent bazaar thing going on around the entrance, where they sell everything from hand-sewn traditional wear (very expensive) to Dracula-shaped plastic squeaky toys (probably made in China) And if the stall owners hear you speak English with an American accent, they will instantly up the prices three times. I'm sorry. This really does happen. History tends to limit itself to war and trade, and since we've had a strong tendency to have our asses kicked in every major conflict, there has to be one way to get back at people.
4. Palinka - if you don't know what that is, you need to book a vacation to Transylvania right now.
Common Misconception [1/1]
Romania gave him a long, calculating stare, and America wondered briefly whether she'd understood him. Her English was a little odd, her accent clipped and the tendency to roll her R's made him slightly uncomfortable for some reason, but otherwise she spoke fairly well.
'I read it in a book,' he supplied, just to be sure. 'I thought it was cool.'
'America,' Romania said, very patiently. 'Vampires do not sparkle.'
The finality in her tone made him frown. America was not generally big on vampire lore, but he tended to believe that authors did some solid, believable research before they wrote anything. Otherwise, who in their right minds would publish them?
'Well, how do you know?'
Romania gave a short laugh. 'According to Mr. Stoker, I am supposed to be somewhat of an authority on the subject.' She pointed in the general direction of the Bran castle, which, America had to admit, looked properly ominous, even in broad daylight.
'You book is wrong.' she concluded. 'And so, I'm afraid, is Mr. Stoker's, although sometimes I do wonder whether we should build him a statue in front of our Trade Ministry building. Or name a street after him.'
America frowned. Surely Mr. Stoker at least had done some solid, believable research before writing his book? He was famous. He'd been famous longer than... what was her name again?
'Vlad did not sparkle.' Romania went on, her tone picking up an odd, vaguely grim note.'Twitch slightly, yes. Giggle to himself, of course. Run fifty people through with sharp sticks and then have lunch while listening to their agonized screams - well, that is historically documented. But he did not sparkle.'
'Cool,' America said a little absently, poking at a plastic mask hung from one of the stalls around them. It began to laugh darkly, and slightly mechanically, its eyes flashing red and eliciting the appearance of a jovial old man from behind the stall.
'For you, just fifteen dollars,' he said happily. Romania rolled her eyes.
'But hey,' America said a few moments later, the mask dangling from its elastic band around his neck, 'There has to be some truth in it, right? Otherwise you wouldn't be selling all these vampire t-shirts, and vampire mugs and vampire woodcuts and tiny fake silver knives and stuff. Um. Right? Why do you sell them anyway?'
'Because your people buy so much of it.' Romania caught his expression, and then began to laugh, honestly and not entirely unkindly.
'Come on,' she said, patting his arm 'I will treat you to some palinka.'
1. Romanians these days kind of make fun of foreigners who go 'ZOMG VAMPIRES!!1!' when visiting Bran Castle. I've been there four or five times and it tends to happen a lot. I think Romania would be very endearing to America about it.
2. Run fifty people through with sharp sticks and then have lunch while listening to their agonized screams - well, that is historically documented - it is. So is the fact that Vlad III 'The Impaler' has had some 80,000 people put to death during his rule, through such exciting methods as impalement, flaying, or driving iron nails through their skulls. Interestingly, the impalement part was a practice he picked up from the Turks, where it was fairly common, but it was Vlad who ended up being famous for it.
3. Aaah, Bran Castle. The famed Dracula's Castle has a permanent bazaar thing going on around the entrance, where they sell everything from hand-sewn traditional wear (very expensive) to Dracula-shaped plastic squeaky toys (probably made in China) And if the stall owners hear you speak English with an American accent, they will instantly up the prices three times. I'm sorry. This really does happen. History tends to limit itself to war and trade, and since we've had a strong tendency to have our asses kicked in every major conflict, there has to be one way to get back at people.
4. Palinka - if you don't know what that is, you need to book a vacation to Transylvania right now.